Comments on: Missing Husband…Or Is He? http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/ Exposing the Underbelly of True Crime Cases Mon, 08 Mar 2010 12:05:11 -0600 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9 hourly 1 By: deskside http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-18159 deskside Thu, 17 Sep 2009 04:27:54 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-18159 Richard, I'm not saying that people don't have the right to leave and start a new life, we all have that right but in a civilized world you don't do it the way Jon and David Rockey did. I lost everything, which for 4 years I didn't care because my love and concern for my husband .... the search for what I thought was my husband's body was more important, overrode all else. But, even if I had been left in good financial standing money does not erase the emotional hell, the nightmare of not knowing where your loved one is. My law just makes people accountable for their actions. If they want to leave and are too coward or in the case of DV to fearful of their lives then this gives them a way to report their wishes to start a new life in a safe environment and families get concrete answers right away. Watch this video that is trailer for a documentary on missing adults: Project Jason: A Voice for the Missing (Documentary) http://voiceforthemissing.com/ (Click on Videos) It will give you an idea what families of missing adults face. My law would stop law enforcement from ever saying all missing adults are off starting new lives or all teenagers are runaways. In the trailer for the documentary there is a young woman who dug up her own brother's rib because law enforcement failed them.....that shouldn't happen to anyone. Had my law been in place and this woman's brother had not reported to police his intention of leaving to start a new life then by law the law enforcement on his case would have had to have treated this as an endangered missing case and taken their search for him seriously. This law could save lives or in the very least give families answers quicker than waiting 2, 5, 10, 15, 20+ years down the road to get answers. This law actually helps to protect those who are off starting new lives. These people put themselves into extremely dangerous situations and lifestyles while in hiding for years. If my law is passed they won't have to hide this way. Not to mention it will certainly help those kidnapped into human trafficking. If a young person doesn't report in their intention to start a new life ..... they may just get rescued, instead of how it now stands where LE thinks they are just off starting new lives. As for mainstream media if your not young and beautiful you don't get press. There are 100,000 missing people in the US alone....how many of their names do you know? How many of their faces do you know? Diane Dimond had the intelligence and compassion to see my story as newsworthy. I was right up there with her Michael Jackson stories. Oh yes this is newsworthy what happened and as I set about getting my law passed and write my book ... you will hear of this, I will make it happen. Maureen Richard,

I’m not saying that people don’t have the right to leave and start a new life, we all have that right but in a civilized world you don’t do it the way Jon and David Rockey did. I lost everything, which for 4 years I didn’t care because my love and concern for my husband …. the search for what I thought was my husband’s body was more important, overrode all else. But, even if I had been left in good financial standing money does not erase the emotional hell, the nightmare of not knowing where your loved one is.

My law just makes people accountable for their actions. If they want to leave and are too coward or in the case of DV to fearful of their lives then this gives them a way to report their wishes to start a new life in a safe environment and families get concrete answers right away.

Watch this video that is trailer for a documentary on missing adults:

Project Jason: A Voice for the Missing (Documentary) http://voiceforthemissing.com/ (Click on Videos)

It will give you an idea what families of missing adults face. My law would stop law enforcement from ever saying all missing adults are off starting new lives or all teenagers are runaways. In the trailer for the documentary there is a young woman who dug up her own brother’s rib because law enforcement failed them…..that shouldn’t happen to anyone.

Had my law been in place and this woman’s brother had not reported to police his intention of leaving to start a new life then by law the law enforcement on his case would have had to have treated this as an endangered missing case and taken their search for him seriously. This law could save lives or in the very least give families answers quicker than waiting 2, 5, 10, 15, 20+ years down the road to get answers.

This law actually helps to protect those who are off starting new lives. These people put themselves into extremely dangerous situations and lifestyles while in hiding for years. If my law is passed they won’t have to hide this way.

Not to mention it will certainly help those kidnapped into human trafficking. If a young person doesn’t report in their intention to start a new life ….. they may just get rescued, instead of how it now stands where LE thinks they are just off starting new lives.

As for mainstream media if your not young and beautiful you don’t get press. There are 100,000 missing people in the US alone….how many of their names do you know? How many of their faces do you know?

Diane Dimond had the intelligence and compassion to see my story as newsworthy. I was right up there with her Michael Jackson stories. Oh yes this is newsworthy what happened and as I set about getting my law passed and write my book … you will hear of this, I will make it happen.

Maureen

]]> By: princess http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-18148 princess Wed, 16 Sep 2009 18:33:58 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-18148 I agree that it can’t be stopped, but I wonder if there were some sort of legal ramification if the spouse suffers financial crisis as a result of their disappearance/voluntary skip. It’s an interesting subject that is becoming more prevalent although not reported by the mainstream media. I agree that it can’t be stopped, but I wonder if there were some sort of legal ramification if the spouse suffers financial crisis as a result of their disappearance/voluntary skip. It’s an interesting subject that is becoming more prevalent although not reported by the mainstream media.

]]> By: Richard Serr http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-18123 Richard Serr Tue, 15 Sep 2009 15:40:04 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-18123 Dave Rockey didn't do that. He received what I would estimate was several hundred thousand dollars in severance pay just before he left. He left it all behind for his wife and kids. I agree what he did was terrible. If you want to make it a crime. Go ahead. Will it stop it? I think not. No more than making suicide a crime has stopped people from killing themselves. Some people do terrible things. You can't stop it. The classic male escape is to kill their entire family before they put the gun to their own head. When a person is willing to do that do you think a law is going to stop them? Dave Rockey didn’t do that. He received what I would estimate was several hundred thousand dollars in severance pay just before he left. He left it all behind for his wife and kids. I agree what he did was terrible. If you want to make it a crime. Go ahead. Will it stop it? I think not. No more than making suicide a crime has stopped people from killing themselves. Some people do terrible things. You can’t stop it. The classic male escape is to kill their entire family before they put the gun to their own head. When a person is willing to do that do you think a law is going to stop them?

]]> By: deskside http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-18113 deskside Tue, 15 Sep 2009 02:45:27 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-18113 Neither David Rockey or Jon Van Dyke fit the "runaway husband" category. Even Vikki Stark the expert on "runaway husbands" does not put them in that category but she does put them in a criminal category. What they did was criminal. These aren't men who just walked away from their lives they ruined their families emotionally and for me financially. These are men that were in 20+ year marriages. They let the world think they were dead, they let their families and friends think they were dead, they KNEW THEY WERE MISSING. For 4 years now I have fought for missing adult males because law enforcement doesn't give a shit about them because of the myth that all missing adults are off starting new lives. When law enforcement hesitates to search because of this myth endangered missing adults die. I don't know what words to say anymore to get people to understand that the maliciously missing spouses actions have nothing to do with their marriages but everything to do with malicious, criminal acts and cowardly ways. You could say it's caused by mental illness but that does their spouses no good as legally we can't get them evaluated. Many criminals are mentally ill. Nice guys, right. You know what one nice guy did after his wife protected his military retirement by letting the military know he was missing for fear that whoever killed him would get access to it? It accumulated for 4 years, around 50,000 he got in one lump sum and you know what he did with the money he "bought clothes, boots, and gambled it away." [Court record if you don't believe me.] He didn't pay his back taxes, he blew it all. He hasn't paid taxes since 2004. Yet YOUR tax money was used to investigage his disappearance. He blew 50K while his wife [me] worked a full and part-time job just to barely get by. While his wife [me] put in 12-14 hour days to come home at night and look at dead bodies in search of answers, in search of the man I loved. All the while I was keeping our family, our daughters our grandsons together, the very family he professed so much love for time and time again....the family he wound up putting through hell on earth. Nice guy, right? How I wish this had been a case of a runaway husband, their wives got to see them turn their backs, I didn't get that, I didn't even get a chance to throw a shoe at his cowardly back. Four years of living a hellish nightmare. Nice guys don't do this to their families, they don't even do it to their enemies. Neither David Rockey or Jon Van Dyke fit the “runaway husband” category. Even Vikki Stark the expert on “runaway husbands” does not put them in that category but she does put them in a criminal category. What they did was criminal. These aren’t men who just walked away from their lives they ruined their families emotionally and for me financially. These are men that were in 20+ year marriages. They let the world think they were dead, they let their families and friends think they were dead, they KNEW THEY WERE MISSING. For 4 years now I have fought for missing adult males because law enforcement doesn’t give a s**t about them because of the myth that all missing adults are off starting new lives. When law enforcement hesitates to search because of this myth endangered missing adults die.

I don’t know what words to say anymore to get people to understand that the maliciously missing spouses actions have nothing to do with their marriages but everything to do with malicious, criminal acts and cowardly ways. You could say it’s caused by mental illness but that does their spouses no good as legally we can’t get them evaluated. Many criminals are mentally ill.

Nice guys, right. You know what one nice guy did after his wife protected his military retirement by letting the military know he was missing for fear that whoever killed him would get access to it? It accumulated for 4 years, around 50,000 he got in one lump sum and you know what he did with the money he “bought clothes, boots, and gambled it away.” [Court record if you don't believe me.] He didn’t pay his back taxes, he blew it all. He hasn’t paid taxes since 2004. Yet YOUR tax money was used to investigage his disappearance. He blew 50K while his wife [me] worked a full and part-time job just to barely get by. While his wife [me] put in 12-14 hour days to come home at night and look at dead bodies in search of answers, in search of the man I loved. All the while I was keeping our family, our daughters our grandsons together, the very family he professed so much love for time and time again….the family he wound up putting through hell on earth. Nice guy, right?

How I wish this had been a case of a runaway husband, their wives got to see them turn their backs, I didn’t get that, I didn’t even get a chance to throw a shoe at his cowardly back. Four years of living a hellish nightmare. Nice guys don’t do this to their families, they don’t even do it to their enemies.

]]> By: princess http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-18093 princess Mon, 14 Sep 2009 15:16:53 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-18093 How could you trust anyone after that, really? I feel bad for the kids, too. Even though they were grown they missed a lot of years with their father. The "runaway husband" really is much more prevalent than we know. I don't think I've ever heard anything like this reported on national news, and since they aren't white and beautiful it's doubtful that their missing stories would make much of a dent between the nightly tidbits. How could you trust anyone after that, really? I feel bad for the kids, too. Even though they were grown they missed a lot of years with their father.

The “runaway husband” really is much more prevalent than we know. I don’t think I’ve ever heard anything like this reported on national news, and since they aren’t white and beautiful it’s doubtful that their missing stories would make much of a dent between the nightly tidbits.

]]> By: Richard Serr http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-18087 Richard Serr Mon, 14 Sep 2009 05:24:00 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-18087 I'm glad that I'll never really understand what Peggy went through. It must have been terrible. I can hardly imagine what it must have like to be left hanging like that. Never knowing what happened. It's no surprise that she immediately filed for divorce upon learning the truth. How can you ever rebuild trust with someone who has put you through that kind of pain? I’m glad that I’ll never really understand what Peggy went through. It must have been terrible. I can hardly imagine what it must have like to be left hanging like that. Never knowing what happened. It’s no surprise that she immediately filed for divorce upon learning the truth. How can you ever rebuild trust with someone who has put you through that kind of pain?

]]> By: Richard Serr http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-18086 Richard Serr Mon, 14 Sep 2009 04:42:32 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-18086 In Dave's case, I don't think it was really about his marriage. I think it was much more about the end of his career. He was a successful middle manager with a 6 figure income. He was too young to retire and too old to start over. At his age, it would have been very difficult to find a position comparable to what he lost. I think he was more like those IBM managers who, after being laid off, didn't tell their wives and kept going to work every day like they still had jobs. They couldn't face their "failure" and obviously couldn't bring themselves to tell their wives that the life they had created together was over. Dave should have told his family. No doubt about that. But that would have required him to face the very thing he couldn't - his perceived failure. I know of people who really did commit suicide in this situation. Most of us managed to pick up the pieces and move on. Maybe you don't really understand unless you've been there. Count yourself lucky if you don't. In Dave’s case, I don’t think it was really about his marriage. I think it was much more about the end of his career. He was a successful middle manager with a 6 figure income. He was too young to retire and too old to start over. At his age, it would have been very difficult to find a position comparable to what he lost. I think he was more like those IBM managers who, after being laid off, didn’t tell their wives and kept going to work every day like they still had jobs. They couldn’t face their “failure” and obviously couldn’t bring themselves to tell their wives that the life they had created together was over. Dave should have told his family. No doubt about that. But that would have required him to face the very thing he couldn’t – his perceived failure. I know of people who really did commit suicide in this situation. Most of us managed to pick up the pieces and move on. Maybe you don’t really understand unless you’ve been there. Count yourself lucky if you don’t.

]]> By: princess http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-18070 princess Sun, 13 Sep 2009 16:19:21 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-18070 Thanks for the comment, Richard. You are right about would she be happier had she found him dead, no. Absolutely not. That's not a memory that I would inflict on anyone. It's just too bad that he wasn't strong enough to just leave, and maybe even call her to say "Hey, it's just not working". That would have at least given her those years to do for herself instead of wondering what happened to him. Breaking up IS hard to do, but someone has to be the adult in the relationship and walk away with all the pieces there - they may be in shambles and none of the pieces in place, but they are all there and will right themselves in time. He bailed and took the pieces with him. Everyone suffered. I hope they can move on now. I'm sure it has been difficult for all of them having to reopen old wounds. Welcome to BH and thanks again for your personal insight. Thanks for the comment, Richard. You are right about would she be happier had she found him dead, no. Absolutely not. That’s not a memory that I would inflict on anyone. It’s just too bad that he wasn’t strong enough to just leave, and maybe even call her to say “Hey, it’s just not working”. That would have at least given her those years to do for herself instead of wondering what happened to him. Breaking up IS hard to do, but someone has to be the adult in the relationship and walk away with all the pieces there – they may be in shambles and none of the pieces in place, but they are all there and will right themselves in time. He bailed and took the pieces with him. Everyone suffered. I hope they can move on now. I’m sure it has been difficult for all of them having to reopen old wounds.

Welcome to BH and thanks again for your personal insight.

]]> By: Richard Serr http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-18068 Richard Serr Sun, 13 Sep 2009 11:49:15 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-18068 I knew Dave Rockey personally. He was one of the nicest guys I ever met. After a long career at Phillips Petroleum he was laid off. He melted down. He wasn't a confrontational person. Apparently he thought the only way out for himself was to disappear. He took almost nothing with him. His wife had their considerable financial resources at her disposal. Was what he did to his family awful? Yes, it was. But I have no idea what the inner workings of his relationship were. Dave never struck me as a strong person. Would his wife have been happier if she had found his brains blown all over the TV room? I doubt it. My sympathy goes to all of them in this tragic situation. Having worked with Dave even as little as I did, I assumed that he had decided to take off. I've been checking for years to see when he would turn back up. He just couldn't cope. I've seen a lot of people in the oil business struggle to deal with being laid off. The ones who had worked for the same company the longest seemed to have the hardest time dealing with it. I never met Peggy. I don't know why Dave couldn't talk to her. Maybe he didn't have the strength for that either. But like I said, I never met a nicer guy than Dave Rockey. I knew Dave Rockey personally. He was one of the nicest guys I ever met. After a long career at Phillips Petroleum he was laid off. He melted down. He wasn’t a confrontational person. Apparently he thought the only way out for himself was to disappear. He took almost nothing with him. His wife had their considerable financial resources at her disposal. Was what he did to his family awful? Yes, it was. But I have no idea what the inner workings of his relationship were. Dave never struck me as a strong person. Would his wife have been happier if she had found his brains blown all over the TV room? I doubt it. My sympathy goes to all of them in this tragic situation. Having worked with Dave even as little as I did, I assumed that he had decided to take off. I’ve been checking for years to see when he would turn back up. He just couldn’t cope. I’ve seen a lot of people in the oil business struggle to deal with being laid off. The ones who had worked for the same company the longest seemed to have the hardest time dealing with it. I never met Peggy. I don’t know why Dave couldn’t talk to her. Maybe he didn’t have the strength for that either. But like I said, I never met a nicer guy than Dave Rockey.

]]> By: deskside http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/2009/07/01/missing-husband-or-is-he/comment-page-1/#comment-16967 deskside Sat, 01 Aug 2009 18:24:27 +0000 http://beaconhell.com/b/blog/?p=1506#comment-16967 Vikki Stark & Burl Barer Saturday, Aug 1 @ 4pm CST Runaway Husbands RUNAWAY HUSBANDS!! Wife (or husband) Abandonment Syndrome Listen Live: http://outlawradio.tv/listenlive.html Some husbands just up and leave -- no warning, no clues -- they are just GONE! Is this mental illness, a criminal act of abandonment, or just a really cool way of getting the hell out? Expert Vikki Stark joins Burl Barer & Don Woldman Saturday August 1st 2pm PST/4pm CST/5pm Eastern to discuss Wife Abandonment Syndrome. ____________________ Maliciously Missing http://www.reintjes.us http://www.dianedimond.net http://peace4missing.ning.com/group/maliciouslyonpurposemissing Vikki Stark & Burl Barer Saturday, Aug 1 @ 4pm CST Runaway Husbands

RUNAWAY HUSBANDS!! Wife (or husband) Abandonment Syndrome

Listen Live: http://outlawradio.tv/listenlive.html

Some husbands just up and leave — no warning, no clues — they are just GONE! Is this mental illness, a criminal act of abandonment, or just a really cool way of getting the hell out?

Expert Vikki Stark joins Burl Barer & Don Woldman Saturday August 1st 2pm PST/4pm CST/5pm Eastern to discuss Wife Abandonment Syndrome.

____________________

Maliciously Missing

http://www.reintjes.us

http://www.dianedimond.net

http://peace4missing.ning.com/group/maliciouslyonpurposemissing

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